Restless

I hope I can fall asleep tonight, its so much on my mind I can’t distinguish the darkness from the light, I try to unwind but my mind keeps me up at night. My legs are restless and my thoughts will not turn off, I’m trying to turn down, but my nerves want to set it off…I’m lost in my head, get out of my head, so I contemplate, take a drink, or take a pill, its my mistake, this is my fate, but I fight with every thing I have left, I count every step, and I grace every breath even though not too long ago I tried to kill myself, its moments like this that I don’t know what to do with myself, and I just think about my health, and how I will gain wealth, how I will lift up from the doldrums, how I will stop needing crutches to lean on, how I can finally know myself, how I can finally love myself, how I can become worthy of love, but how can I move on from here, I keep feeling that the end of the world is near…

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