When you cheat on me…

When you cheat on me…

How does it start? Is it intentional? Did you search to find the perfect candidate? Was she everything on your list? Is she capable of taking my place? Have I failed you? Is my turn up? Was I not good enough? When I call you over and over, do you wish I just stop calling? Do you roll your eyes, are you annoyed by my name on the screen? Do you make plans while you’re laying next to me? Are you not concerned about my feelings? Are you telling her you love her? When you make love to her, are you just fucking, or are you moaning, telling her how good it is, holding her, caressing her, looking in her eyes? Is she trembling, screaming, indulging in pleasure? Do you think about me? I’m home, lying in your bed, calling your phone, so do you think about me? When you ignore my call, is that your choice? Did you choose her over me? If so why did you come back to me? Why not stay with her? What made you choose her over me? Is she prettier? Is it better? Is she more stable? Is she more accommodating? Is she less confrontational? Does she comfort you? Do you tell her all your secrets? Do you create a bond with her? Are you calm? Baby are you in love with her? Are you in love with me? Is she more fun? Do you do things with her that you won’t do with me?


A concerned woman 👩🏿

Thank God

Thank you God for guiding me through the first two months of the year. I have made some accomplishments, and I have made some mistakes. I also have strayed away, yet I remain hopeful. Lord, I thank you for my family, I thank you for friends, I ask that you continue to protect us and bless us. God bless my enemies and soften their hearts. God I ask that you bring us all closer and closer to you. I speak the blood of christ over every attack, and I ask that you forgive us for our sins. Lord help us to find you in Jesus’ name in every situation. Lord when I have doubts I ask that you show up and make me aware of your presence. Lord continue to guide me as we approach another month. Lord reveal to me my sins known and unknown. Lord help me to continue along good paths.Lord bless the company I keep and help me to portray your image .Help me God to be more like Jesus. Father we all need you right now.In the name of Jesus March will be a blessed and prosperous month. We will all find peace and comfort in the name of Jesus. Lord walk with us. I love you Lord and I hold joy with you. Lord in March people will earn and learn more in the name of Jesus. People will find jobs and homes in the name of Jesus. People will have cars and insurance in the name of Jesus. We will find understanding and wisdom in the name of Jesus. We will repent and make changes in the name of Jesus. We will seek you God in the name of Jesus. I receive my blessings on time in the name of Jesus. God there will be less hate, less gossip, less slander, less greed, less pain in the name of Jesus.Lord bless us and comfort us in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Let go, Let God.

Lord, I want to let you Lead me. Guide me and order my steps. I can do anything with you, and nothing without you. You are so amazing to love and give so abundantly. You are the creator, and you deserve all the praise. Thank you, God for sacrificing your son Jesus christ to save us from our sins. Lord you are so merciful and graceful. I am far from perfect, yet you accept me and love me. You are so selfless and perfect. I am a sinner, I do wrong, but you are willing to forgive me. Lord, we need you. This world has turned so evil, save us Lord in the name of Jesus. God I want to be where you are. You are a conquerer, a healer, a deliverer. Lord you deserve the glory. God thank you for everything. God bless my family, my man, my friends, and my enemies and strangers. Help me to forgive as I ask for forgiveness from you. Lead me, Oh God. Lead this country, this world, cities, states, neighborhoods, God we need you right now. Thank you God in advance for your notorious blessings. You are so Good. In the name of Jesus I pray Amen. #Biblefor21
21 Days Of Powerful Breakthroughs


Thanks for liking my posts!

Thank you to all the people who like my posts here. I know that I am not the best writer; In fact, many times I can’t conjour up enough thoughts to conjour up a post. I am an aspiring writer with potential, and the greatest day of my life will be when I feel righteous and when I become a great writer. I guess I could scramble here all day, but really I just want to say thank you. It means so much to me when even just one person likes my post, because I feel like it means I am on the right path. Maybe people like my posts out of pity, maybe its for more likes and follows for themselves, or maybe it is because they can relate. Whatever the case may be, Thank you! May God Bless you!

No days off

Finally, an entire two days off of work! No getting up at 5am, no going out in the cold to warm the car up! I get to eat breakfast in the morning, cuddle next to my man, stay up late eating chocolate chip cookies. Oh the beauty of sleeping in. Two days off of work may not be much to many,  but I am so thankful. Although, I picked up two twelve hours days to make up for the overtime. This $10 an hour thing allows no time off, and you absolutely must take any overtime offered. When will I finish school, when will I obtain a prestigious position. Working everyday of the week is making me weak. I am thankful for my job though. I know things could be worse. So when its all said and done I am just oh so thankful for two days off!

Save us🎭

My heart goes out to the people who lost their lives today at Ft. Lauderdale airport. Rest in peace. God bless their families and the people who were injured. God bless the family of the 26 year old who decided to commit such a hateful crime. My heart and soul also goes out to my brothers and sisters in Detroit who are losing their lives daily. God heal the murderers. It’s becoming so scary to watch the news, its all just so close. This world is such a sinful and evil place. Lord, bless this world, we need you now. Protect us Lord, forgive us for our sins, guide us and stregthen us. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.

Follow your dreams❤

What are you going to blog about today? Since about 6pm, I have poked at topics. Even now I have nothing specific to grasp anyone’s interest. My goal is to prove that I am intellectual, intelligent, inspiring, and potentially a good writer.

As a child, when asked what I want to be when I grew up, I would always say a journalist. I happened to possess very good handwriting skills. Being a journalist meant writing for me, and apparently this is something I love(d). I was always better with english than other subjects, which made a career in journalism more attractive. I thought about other careers and at a young age, The schooling for doctor’s seemed extreme. 

I wrote many poems, and I always kept a diary. I’m literally an open book, if you want to find out something about me, it’s probaly in writing. I wrote songs and poems with my friends often. I also loved reading, I loved books and information. Somehow, somewhere I fell off track.

As I grew older life happened of course, and, well I’m 27 now with no career. I have a job as a caregiver earning slightly over minimum wage. It pays my bills, but I’ve always wanted to actually have a prestigous career. I’ve attended several community colleges, racked up student loan debt, and I have never completed anything beyond my high school diploma. It’s nearly time for the ten year high school reunion.

So, the golden rule is that in order to solve a problem is to admit/realize you have a problem. I have a problem. I lack motivation and drive. I am inconsistent and indecisive. I can be frivolous and impulsive. Despite, these problems though I still aspire to be successful.

Suddley, writing remained a part of me in diaries, journals, data entries, signatures, letters, and emails. I always loved letters, words, sentences, and the way they come together. I love the way words operate.

Over the years, I’ve come over the idea that writers don’t make much money. If they do, the ones like me never will. I’m just not that interesting, not that educated, not that successful. I have tried many career paths, but none to my interest and near age 30 I have started to contemplate about becoming an author, publisher, freelance writer, or any writer. 

I love writing. I think that I would actually stick to a writing career. Maybe all along my career was right in front of me. Maybe it is not too late to grasp it. Is there some huge secret to becoming a successful recognized writer?  Will I make top dollar? Probaly not, but maybe this is that passion that holds: you never work a day at a job you love. Follow your dreams, they tend to follow you😉.


2017 is already filled with uncertainty; I am living with someone who hates me. I brought this year in with high hopes and prayer, so my faith remains strong regardless of any outcomes. I’ve been called heartless, and I may seem cold. The truth though, holds that I am numb, I can’t feel and I really can’t produce tears.

My only certainty in life is that God loves me regardless of my sinful nature. I bow my head and I pray for forgiveness, so that I may have a chance at joy and redemption. Daily I rebuke satan from my life, I beg the Lord to keep the devil away from my family.

Although I come across doubtful thoughts, my faith is strong. What I pray for I believe in so I thank the Lord in advance.2017 you almost disappointed me early, but I know the best is yet to come. Whatever God has in store for me I gracefully accept. Though I am flawed, I know there is hope for me.

Marcus, The last thing I want is for you to hate me or to think that I am heartless. I beg to differ, but unfortunately I am not willing to explain. I have no fight left as far as proving myself to you. I pray this works out, but I pray for you personally. I pray for your family, I pray for your heart. I pray for your health.

God is my Savior, I trust him to save me. God is my healer and deliverer, I trust him to heal and deliver me.

Yes, Lord! 

Bless this world, Bless my family, Heal us Lord we need you NOW! In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.

Daily Post

The question of my integrity is a huge regret to me, I am misunderstood and judged by the exterior. 

Daily I attempt to makeover the outside of me, so that it is understood completely and reflects my interior.

I am flawed in most ways, but mistakes I make are never intentional, My entire life I really strive to be conventional.

Wrenches get thrown in my plans as roadblocks, and change the story written with beautiful calligraphy. 

Eraser marks, scratchouts, and white out, cover the best parts of me.

If I could turn myself inside out I would be sick, but maybe it will earn my self worth.

My goals come with stipulations regardless of how hard I work, because of my past.

I guess maybe we won’t last, you feel the pain everyday and its nothing I can do. The worst part is I love you.I don’t know how I can fix things, I just wish my heart, feelings, reasoning and intention mattered. I get it though pain hurts the exterior and interior.


I welcome you with open arms,

And I pray you are good to me;

I’ll be good to me and you.

I’ve pondered upon resolutions,

But I’ve yet to list them.

I want to become closer to God.

Quit smoking cold turkey,

Open a checking/savings account,

Find a new job

With more prestige and pay

Become closer to my family

Get married

Conceive a child

Buy a house

This year began in a storm,

But it ended with a rainbow.

January 2016 I resided in a hotel

I took the bus to work

I did not groom well

I was fired from a job

By the end of the year

I bought a car

I found an apartment 

I began to self groom

And I have a steady job

I remain humble and thankful

I pray that I perservere consistently 

I pray that 2017 brings joy,

Prosperity, decisiveness, 

Humbleness, and success.

2017 I pray for better days.